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dc.creatorClark, Jessie May
dc.date.accessioned2021-03-29T14:28:37Z
dc.date.available2021-03-29T14:28:37Z
dc.date.issued1893-10-28
dc.identifier.urihttps://repository.tcu.edu/handle/116099117/44268
dc.descriptionChristianity and Spiritual life, Blanche update
dc.format.medium5x8 paper
dc.relationClark Family Letters
dc.rightsPrior written permission from TCU Special Collections required to use any document or photograph
dc.sourceBox 2, Folder 1, Item 5
dc.subjectClark, Jessie May
dc.subjectClark, Addison, Jr. "Addie"
dc.titleLetter to Addison Clark Jr.
dc.typeDocument
dc.description.transcriptionThorps Spring.Oct. 28, 1893.Dear Brother: I’ve felt unwell all day and slept most of the afternoon so here it is after preaching and noletter written. Mr. Campbell preached to night and his sermon was excellent, -he is an earnest Christian –if there is any truth in the world. He arousedmy sleeping spirit and made me realize more than ever what a useless, indifferent, passive ChristianI am. I don’t know what is the matter with me, I’m not what I once was, -and today the thought thrust itself upon me that I’ve almost shut Christ out of my heart in that theI have not the love for him and his works in my heartthat should be there. I tremble when I think how I’ve been living for months.A mere cipher in God’s vineyard, -perhaps influencing no one to evil but none to good.I go to prayer meeting but say nothing when all are asked for some thing –and refuse to pray when asked, -not really because I don’t want to do anything but because I have nothing worth saying and do not feel worthyto pray in public. But enough of this. I pray that I may be drawn closer to our Savior. Let’s always pray for each other, -it is so strengthening to know you have a true friend on this earth, onewho is anxious for you to live right. We know wewill stand by each other whatever comes, but we need a third One to help us stand for right. If it is hard for me to live right here where I have examples and influences on every side of me I wonder what wouldbecome of me elsewhere. I some times feel that my heart is so hardened, and I with-hold the love and sympathy from those around me that I, as one of them, owe. We go on with a smiling face and the world smiles back, but beneath that smile how little sincerity and truth. I fear I’m becoming cynical. I’m not happy as I was last year when with you at Greenwood.While we had so few pleasures there yet I was happy and my mind at rest, and peace with the world. Perhaps other things contributed to that pleasant state of feeling that have since been denied me. Well I have a will, and I will rise above this low feeling that now is master of me, and act and feel differently in spite of everything. A word from you helpsmost. –last summer while in Canada I would sometimes be on the point of yielding to my baserself when a timely letter from you would set me on my feet again. So help me with loving words and prayers. I’m still getting along well with my school, and asyet am not tired of it, but in spite of the weighty responsibility resting upon me and the physical wear I enjoy it, really lovethe work, -and I am most sure we have the worst set of children here to be found any where.Our society is still on the uphill road, and we wish to keep it there. Last evening the program was fine.-Blanche read such a good essay.And I though while looking at her and listening to her voice how can any boy help but love her. Seems that every boy would fall in love with heron first sight, -but fortunately for you this is not the case, -not that it would in any way affect her, but itwould naturally cause you a great deal of uneasiness. Not all boys are attracted byher quiet, unassuming manner, but those who look for a true womanly heart can not fail to recognize it there. Not often you find a pretty face –one generally considered pretty –and a true heart belonging to the same person. I have been reading “Opening A Chestnut Burr, -and pronounce it fine. When I have any time for reading my mind is in no condition to appreciate anything very deep, so I have a tendencyto devote my spare moments to light literature. I fear I can’t get up the recital I wished so much to, will through if possible.Much love. Will send guitar soon as we can have a box made. Am glad you joinedthe gymnasium.Yours-Sister.


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